Saturday, 31 October 2015

31st October 2015

Love: today is my brother's birthday. My parents say we're like chalk and cheese and, it's true, I don't think I could live under the same roof as him without us driving each other crazy. He's still my brother though. So happy birthday, Phill!
Life: today was another day at heArt School. Today we were creating faces. However, by lunch break I could feel myself getting tense so I decided to do an abstract canvas just for the excuse to splat some paint on the canvas and release some of the tension! Talking of which, I figure the tension was created by the lovely atmosphere there is at the studio. It's a stark contrast to how I feel at college where I've quickly had to develop a thick skin to help me deal with it. By contrast, I feel safe enough to allow myself to be vulnerable when I'm with my Sistas. So I feel the tension was created by me resisting allowing myself to be soft and vulnerable because I know in three days time I cannot be that way! Which, in reflection, is a huge shame. I'd like to see if there was some way to allow myself to be soft and vulnerable at college because that's when I feel empowered and real. After heArt School I went to my friend Sonia's birthday party. Like my brother, she's a Halloween baby too. It was a quiet affair - a home cooked meal with a few of her friends - but pleasant for it. :)
One Thing: the one thing I'm choosing today is responding to my needs to release my tension. In the past, I didn't really listen to my body or pay attention to my needs. So it's a invaluable gift that Art From The Heart and Big Love Sista/Clare/heArt School has given me these last couple of years that I am now able to do that. :)