Saturday, 30 January 2016

30th January 2016

Mia: not really seen much of Mia today as I left home just after 9am and she curled up to sleep pretty soon after I got home again.
Life: I got into Liverpool to buy material for the huge collage I'm going to do (using one of my giant abstract canvases as a backdrop). I've decided I'm gonna create art that I'd want on my wall and this is gonna be one of them. Then I went to heArt School where we were learning sculpture today with a lady called Ember Vincent, whose work is brilliant! :) I thoroughly enjoyed working with the clay and was so proud of the fairy god I created in commemoration of John. :) I loved it so much I bought some clay off Ember to do some more! (Guess what people are getting for pressies this year! Lol!) :) After that a bunch of us went for a drink (a pretty bland mocha in my case) and then I came home. This evening I have watched some catch-up telly but then began to beat myself up about my lack of courage where my love life is concerned. It's difficult to get out of that frame of mind because, even when I'm telling myself not to do it, I'm beating myself up about beating myself up! :( So, to give credit where it's due, I'm not a coward because I have opened my heart to love again when, in the months after John died, I was convinced I wouldn't!
One Thing: the one thing I'm choosing today is going to heArt School and creating a piece of sculpture that I really love and, in its own way, is a fitting tribute to my love for John. :) My art is so much better when it comes from the heart! :)